Why do I need to give you an answer? Why do you have to care so much about why I don’t care about socializing with you? Why so much concern for someone not opting for your company or your choice. Why would I take interest in a group where people want to be friendly but not friends? I never forget. I never forgive. Let others burn in the aftermath. I don’t need your stupid get togethers to open up. You don’t deserve to know me. And I don’t care about your issues any second beyond what I’ve to bear with. There’s no middle ground. I tried being my best and now I’m pushed to be at my worst. I’ll put up that mask everytime that misleads you to think that I care even the tiniest bit to waste any more time than I absolutely need to. Betrayal will be paid back in kind.. multiplied.

Never ever ask the same damn thing again. Because next time, if ever there’s one…I’ll not be as nice as last time. And it won’t matter where it would happen.




After a recommendation from a colleague, got down to watching this movie that was equal parts troublesome and equal parts positive outcome reinforcement. Obviously the title of the movie sets the basic premise of where the major pat of the movie would be shot (or so I thought). I was comparing the flow with that of the movie ‘Buried’ (2010) which had Ryan Reynolds remain stuck in the coffin like enclosure with no positive outcome at all. Extremely difficult to see it through till the end and then some worse.  Movies on the theme of complete captivity for several years have often come about and it’s always been the exit as the final goal or how seriously the whole experience had messed up the minds of those held captive for years with no contact with the outside world. Comparatively, ‘The Room’, induces the right amount of psychological discomfort and a pleasant twist on the expectations of further negativity.   Continue reading ‘The Room (2015) (how it was like to me aka Review)’

Are you listening? Are you reading? Are you … lost? Ah, that sounds a lot like me, trying to find my way around this dark distraction free writing tool. In a sea of darkness within and without my mind, the distraction and the focus have blended as one. It’s the tangle that’s just mixed up into one single full screen of ondhokar, no maze lines to trace my way in or out of it. Some of it I intend to remain this obscured and some of it I need to make sense out of. You may know of writer’s block that an empty piece of paper can trigger. I’m not a writer (I’d be out of a job anyway with this horribly slow rate of writing) but even expressions don’t just occur in nice English sentences. They would be like road wrecks of midway collisions of countless number of thoughts or just tho__’s (that is incomplete thoughts for those without imagination).

So what can I talk about today if I’m blinded and gagged by this morose darkness? What do I feel you need to know and what do I feel I need to tell? Are they the same or are they different? Will I tell anything at all or will I just keep asking? Will I have only thoughts to be confined in the prison that’s my mind or will I tell about all the new things I learnt of and write it down like a journal that’d be just of as much as interest as merely knowing that I did take the trouble to write something on this day?

Is it important to write what I consider a standard size blog post, filling it up with what I maybe currently working on or learning about on the Internet or the real world or is it just enough to just write random stuff that is the chaos in my head and try justifying it as a post (coz I fucking said so). Here goes nothing, (yea finally! right?)
Continue reading ‘Hello Me, What’s Up’

I do wish a lot of times, my laptop had the resources AND more importantly the requisite drivers needed to run a 3d desktop like Cinnamon or (ugh) Unity. They have been around for like quite a few years, but my laptop has been around even longer. When I think about it, I really can’t put a finger on why exactly am I so attached to this first laptop of mine. Well, let’s see:

  1. Got it for free from my parents. Still works, so why not.
  2. Has always managed to bounce back up.
    1. Screen stopped coming back on.
    2. Won’t start because it got too hot.
    3. Wrong driver disabled WiFi and sent machine into kernel panic
    4. Tons more kernel panics.
  3. Can see the latest movies (VLC) and browse with the latest (and safest) browser (Firefox 39)
  4. Helps me with my WfH option without having to lug the equally heavy Dell laptop from office.
  5. Has allowed me to avoid any kind of official tech support for it, for like forever.
  6. Tests my patience…oh no no, not that one. I mean it teaches me patience. Hints me to explore real world.

Continue reading ‘8 years of my Inspiron 1501: Still Alive…and Dell’



Sad excuse of a post, but this is what I am getting started with. No no restarting. I’m not familiar with that. Don’t remember any such concept. 😉

There are producers and there are consumers of content but now there are curators of content and curators of curators of content. Making consuming a lot of content and my time very very easy and making writing boring stuff very very difficut to really gather traction.

That’s the stuff I can only come up with and that never helped me in the past. There is a feeling of uncertainty when trying to blog in today’s time without trying to consume the whole of internet…or reddit frontpage. This is also the first time I am writing using the wordpress website itself. Not focussing in a distraction free editor right now. All that JDarkRoom would remind with its environment is something I’ll leave for others to deal with. Yea me selfish! Muhuhahaha (Kinda more funny than Muhahaha)

Talking about life is again so blah! Need to take some time and think what about it I may or may not talk about. For now it’s a good thing I did feel like writing again. Not that I’d care if this got lost or something. I’ll probably write better next time.

Before shutting up, I guess I can quickly point out that of the 7 add-ons active in my browser (Firefox, of course), 5 are security/privacy focused and the rest two are for content capture. Some of them I’d like to talk about soon. Though I know a hundred things (maybe a little…more than a little…less) that are trying to blast through my mind. But I need to save some for next time, but damn remembering stuff is so hard! At least this is a topic where the content is always staring me in the face and I’m constantly thanking that.

So how have you been? More importantly have you ever lost track of blogging and then got back to it once or more than once? What did you write about? What worked for you? Begging for inspirations despirately I suppose. :p

p.s. Don’t ask about the title. No that didn’t occur to me on the throne. Just the voice in my head that I just imagine is in the act of pushing me off my state of inertia with regards to writing content on my blog. Hoping this again is not the only post of the year. Annual blog existence reminder post.

I have come to a stage in blogging with such a long break since my last post that it feels like the decade, since I started, had never happened. So this may read/sound quite meta. One thing that really hinders me with getting back into the writing habit is the really-tough-to-type-on old laptop keyboard. Really tough because most keys are almost jammed (esp. backspace). Really tough because my typing has been mostly converted to swiping and hoping autocorrect figures out the swish swoosh pattern I did (which it often fails). I do have WordPress on the mobile but I haven’t gotten comfortable in writing anything of substantial length on a tap-tap screen. That and the fact that the screen keeps turning off before an idea bulb could turn on in my head. It is quite distracting. As i might have said before, most of my ideas and expressions almost always get summarized and fit in a tweet. Elaborating beyond that feels like delaying the conveying of the same. Continue reading ‘Meta Post: Attempted Re-ignition of a bye-gone habit.’

The pro of a Linux supporter is that they are proactive on forums. Their intention to ‘suggest’ is misread as intention to help. The con of the Linux supporter is that they don’t clarify that they don’t intend to solve the problem. Not even a GOTO Linux statement is remotely useful without actually helping the user plan out the migration systematically with least downtime in day to day work. Linux users should know better how critical downtime is. Those who use at work at least. Fact is that it does take equally tremendous effort whether you keep fighting the battle on Windows ground or shift base to Linux. Neither category of ‘help’ need be discouraged. And as much as it sucks to be pushed away (figuratively) to RTFM when you are learning Linux, it’s not fair to expect a Windows user to take the same treatment. They didn’t sign up for that. Not that they can’t read..